LESSON C (3) READING
Read the article. In which paragraph does the writer talk about…
1 teenagers not listening to parents. ________
2 examples of things parents shouldn’t say. ________
3 what listening parents do. _______
4 A different language that teenagers speak. _________
5 Whether parents talk with or at their children.______
Text ‘Do parents and teenagers really talk?’.
My parents don’t listen me! This the most common complaint teenagers have about their parents. Even teens who generally get along well with their parents wish they would listen more, talk with them more, be less critical and judgmental, and be more willing to discuss the teen’s point of view.
Parents on the other hand, have the same complaint: ‘ he won’t listen to me! Parents complain that teens are silent or moody, aggressive and loud. They wish their teens would share more and talk with them in a friendly fashion. They wish their teens would listen more and criticize them less.
Unfortunately, the style of much parent/teen communication is negative and ineffective. Parents should ask themselves, ‘ Do I talk at my teenager or do I talk with my teenagers? Parents who talk at teens are often reminding, threatening, blaming, questioning, ordering or judging. This style is used to pressure teens into doing something parents want them to do and the effect is decreased effective communication.
How would adults feel about these comments: ‘ That dress is too tight!’ The lawn looks terrible. Are you even too lazy to cut the grass right? ‘ Why can’t you be more like Sam?’ ‘ Eat your salad’ Would they remain friends with a person who made such remarks to them? Can they hear echoes of their own voice talking at their teen?
Parents who talk with teenagers listen. They listen to what teens are thinking, feeling or wanting to do. They try to understand and accept teens point of view. In addition, they are not afraid to express their own views or share feelings and concerns.
The relationship between parents and teens is often highly emotional. Their relationship is changing, and booth parents and teens want to be heard, understood and accepted. If this is to be achieved, parents especially must listen with their hearts as well as their heads.
What is becoming more and more common, however in the Age of the Internet, is that teenagers are beginning to speak a new language – a language that parents don’t understand. Teen speak is a product of instant messaging and Internet chat, worlds teenagers spend an increasing amount of time in. Teen speak has also become popular through modern music. The fact that teenagers are not understood by their parents and parents cannot understand what their children are saying is yet another reason why communication breaks down. Seems like parents need to go back to school…